The Only Way

The labyrinth at Rancho La Puerta is a full scale replica of the one found at Chartres Cathredral. If you’ve never walked one, it is a powerful meditative ritual, with a meandering path that brings you to the center and leads you back out again.

While there are many insights to be gained from walking the spiraling path, this week I was reminded that if we are to live an authentic life out in the world, we must also be ready to walk the inner path where we encounter that which resides in our shadows. 

In life as with the labyrinth, the only way out, is the way in.

Self-Centering

A week at a health spa is unquestionably a privileged opportunity to engage in some serious self-care, and a privilege that should never, ever...as in never, ever, be taken for granted. Yet what I’ve found to be true among those who have the resources to have such a week, and those who never will, is a deep feeling that any form of self-care is selfish. That anytime we indulge in putting ourselves first, we are acting in a self-centered way, and none of us wants to be seen as someone who does that. 

I’ve come to see it differently.

All of us are here to serve others, and to be served. To give of ourselves, and to receive from others. To love, help, and heal the world and those within our reach, and to be loved, helped, and healed by those who reach out to us. Learning to care well for ourselves is what equips us to care well for others.  

I guess the simplest way to sum it up is that when we practice loving self-care, rather than being self-centered, we are able to operate from a centered self.

The Storm

Overnight a storm blew in.

Yesterday, it was sunny and breezy, with blue skies. Today, it is all rain, wind, and low clouds.

Yesterday, everyone was outside and active. Today, everyone is inside and still.

So much happens in the midst of a storm. Blossoms blow off trees preparing the way for new leaves, rain nourishes the thirsty earth, and the air is cleared.

What happens in nature is a picture of what is meant to occur in our own heart and soul.

When the storm blows in, allow it to do its work. 

From Here To There

The trail from here to there always starts with the ground upon which we stand. Sometimes it is the distance that seems insurmountable, and other times the chasm to be crossed appears so deep we can’t imagine finding our way across.

Either way, the only possibility of making our way there begins with our next step.

Onward. 

Together.

Being Brave

As I write this today at Rancho La Puerta, our first workshop has finished and I am once again reminded of the courage we are asking people to find in order to answer the questions we pose. Anytime we choose to listen to our inner wisdom, we are entering territory that is both sacred and scary, standing on ground that feels both holy and shaky. As Brene Brown reminds us, any act of courage can only happen when we are also willing to be vulnerable. That is what I witnessed again today as those in our workshop listened generously to themselves, trusted what they heard, and found their way to possible next right steps. While bringing the time together to a close, I shared a story from  my last trip here this past July when my 33 year old daughter Lauren joined me.

During the week she not only enjoyed the beauty of this place and some wonderful spa treatments, she also attended my workshops. It was obvious watching her, that she had decided to show up fully for herself and go all in. She listened to her voice and captured what she heard. The night after that first workshop, I returned to our villa to find her happily reading in bed. Mom, you have my journal from the workshop in your pack pack, right? Wrong. Digging through everything in there, twice, there was no journal to be found. Standing in her doorway, I watched as her face crumpled into tears as she realized that the words she had bravely written, but that were for her eyes only, had been lost somewhere in the Ranch. She felt exposed and betrayed, as she pulled the covers over her head and said, I get brave and choose to write about really fragile and private things that I’ve been too afraid to think about till now, and look what happens. 

It was suddenly clear to me what we needed to do. I firmly told her to get up, get dressed, and come with me. Resistant for a minute, she chose to trust me and we were soon walking through the darkness back to the room where the workshop had been held. A Ranch employee was cleaning up the room, and I asked if we could look through the box of unused journals that had been picked up after my session. Lauren began to sort through the stack, pretty certain hers wouldn’t be there. And then her hands landed on the one that was hers. Gripping it to her heart, we started back to our room, and walked in silence for awhile, as her relief settled in.

Remember, I said, whenever we are brave enough to take action on our own behalf, to do the hard work of becoming our most authentic self, and to step more fully into our own lives, we are supported by unseen forces. And when you find yourself afraid in the future, and you will, you will always have the memory of tonight to remind you that you are not alone.

Onward.

Together. 

Todays post shared with gratitude for the permission to tell her story, and her courage to always show up.

Remember

The Ranch is a reminder to trust the wisdom held deep within our bodies. 

Remember who you were before the world told you who you were supposed to be. 

Remember who you are and what you stand for, and never apologize for being true to yourself. 

Remember to trust the voice within. 

Remember to hold on to yourself. 

Remember to care well for yourself. 

Remember your strength. 

Remember that you are never alone. 

Threshold Moments

There are such things as Threshold Moments. Those times when we are invited to step over fear and uncertainty, cross over the border of the familiar and the comfortable, and venture into the unknown. Marking both the ending of what has been, and the beginning of what could be, it is the threshold that bridges the gap.

Sometimes that threshold sits beneath a door that opens inward, summoning us deeper into self-knowledge and awareness. This usually requires that we find the courage to look into our shadows, those parts of ourselves that we prefer to ignore or keep hidden, or those issues and relationships that call for our attention, but are painful, or scary to look at.

At other times we are invited to venture further out, beyond the boundaries we’ve come to count on. Taking risks, embarking on new work, making important changes, and practicing new ways of being in the world.

Threshold moments are game changers, and the choice is always ours to step over the threshold.

Or not.

Either way the game changes.

Steering

Yesterday I spent a few wonderful hours with my 2 1/2 year old grand boy. We headed to the park with his stroller, him riding, me pushing. Once there we had the park to ourselves, which meant that all of the play structures were his for the taking. He couldn’t have cared less. He was all about the stroller. Not riding in it. Pushing it. 

“Mimi, I want to push it.” he said in his sweet, quiet voice, with ample space between each word.

Determined and sure of himself, off we set. Him steering, me following. For the next hour I walked behind him, mesmerized as he navigated each and every obstacle in his path. When the stroller got stuck in a muddy patch, or the pitch of the path got a little too steep, he would stop, step to the side, peer ahead, assess the problem, and then make the course correction necessary to keep moving ahead. With every passing step his confidence grew, and watching him find his own way, I could look ahead and imagine those same hands steering a tricycle. A bicycle. A car. 

It was one of the most delightful and insightful hours I’ve spent in a long time. One step at a time, we learn what we need to learn in order to be prepared for that which lies ahead. What we learn today equips us for what we encounter tomorrow. Who knows where his journey will take him, but one thing I know for sure; he has already figured out that in order to steer his own ship, he first has to master steering his own stroller.

What a smart boy.  

Pilgrim’s Progress

Being a Pilgrim 

To journey without being changed

is to be a nomad. 

To change without journeying  

is to be a chameleon. 

To journey and to be transformed

by the journey

is to be a pilgrim. 

~ Mark Nepo 

What We Seek

con·tent·ment

to be at peace with the contents of one’s life

Quote courtesy of Matters That Matter®