“If a problem is fixable, if a situation is such that you can do something about it, then there is no need to worry. If it's not fixable, then there is no help in worrying. There is no benefit in worrying whatsoever.”
Dali Lama XIV
Recently some good friends moved away. They had taken jobs two states away and were in the process of wrapping up life here, and unwrapping it there. This is a good move for them, and they are excited about what lies ahead. As we were visiting one morning, it was clear that while they felt good about the move, they were also anxious about how the whole picture was going to come together. That concern was making it hard to make progress on the list of tasks yet to be accomplished.
"What is causing you the most anxiety and stress right now?" I asked.
They didn't skip a beat.
"Where we are going to live."
Anxiety about that particular piece of their relocation puzzle was making it hard to keep track of all the other things that needed to happen. If that piece could fall into place, the rest of the pieces would probably follow suit. It did, and, they did.
If you're like me, you probably prefer not to think about whatever is causing you distress. But no matter how hard we try and push it down, it is still there. Like an app that runs in the background on our devices, it drains the life of our battery. The sooner we address the source of our worry, the more energy we will have for the life in front of us. Worry often doesn't seem to have rhyme or reason. Avoiding a small thing can make it almost impossible to take on a big thing. A big thing left undone can get in the way of little things that could easily be accomplished. Important things left unaddressed, can make it hard to tackle the more mundane but necessary things. Whatever the reason, worry can wreak havoc on our days.
If you took care of the source of your worry, what other pieces of your puzzle would fall into place?
Grab a pen.
"What is causing you the most anxiety right now?"
How may I help you?